Bubbles or no bubbles...

What do you do when your 2-year-old is more advanced than your 7-year-old?
I can tell you what I do... grieve and blog.
The trigger: blowing bubbles.
Yep. That simple. A task every child seeks to accomplish. Exciting!! Yet it is a task my 2-year-old has mastered and Samuel (7/almost 8-years-old) cannot. Not yet anyway.

My 2-year-old, Ellie, communicates better than Samuel. She follows directions better than Samuel. She's able to do more on the playground than Samuel. The list goes on. I won't harp on it.

I remember years ago, (6 years to be exact) pregnant with Gabriel, being worried that Samuel's little brother would supersede him (see this blog entry). Them being a mere 22 months apart I could justify it in my mind. But now! Oh now!!! Ellie and Samuel being a vast FIVE YEARS apart; this allows for no justification. I have to face the hard facts: Samuel is 5+ years delayed.

I don't grieve because of the delays. I grieve because of the Samuel I don't know. The thoughts I don't hear. The desires he has that he can't express. The dreams he's dreamt. The funny ways he sees the world. I'll never know.

I grieve because I don't know him as well as I know my other babies. Will I ever? Will he be able to tell me his favorite song? His dreams at night? His dreams about his future? I grieve for the unknown.

It's a process. But I can tell you, he is the sweetest boy I know. He may not be able to talk or blow bubbles but he can bring a smile to the hardest of hearts. I rejoice in his abilities. I rejoice as he rejoices with others in their accomplishments. The way he praises Ellie for blowing bubbles. The way he laughs when she sings or counts or does anything else he is not able to do. And I encourage him! I encourage him to blow bubbles, talk, poop in the potty, sing, pray, draw, write, count... I am his biggest encourager!! Forever and always.